How honest are we with ourselves?

4 Comments

1. - Ken - June 21, 2020 Reply

   well, i know i’m really smart and my INTJ personality along w/ my mental intensity can be too much for most people when i’m trying to explain something to them in person and end-up giving them too much detail/more than they can handle or want…or by delving into things they’ve never considered or they’re having a hard time accepting/reaching the conclusions i have. which leads me to my point: i have never in my life yawned in someone’s face when they were talking to me. not only do i think it’s a rotten/very annoying thing to do, but i just never do it. people do often times bore me, and so i don’t interact w/ many much; but i certainly can make my father yawn in front of me w/out trying. his mind just shuts down (he’s O+ w/ a personality type: ISTJ…we’ve never gotten along well). overall, i’d say my mom’s smarter w/ maybe an ES/NFP Myers–Briggs personality type (she’s A+). she doesn’t yawn when i go deep or get intense, but she cannot handle much of my thought process usually and not for very long. now my only sibling younger brother, a little more than a year younger, he’s more like my father. he’s O+ and probably an ESTJ personality. he’s smart but he doesn’t get too deep either. he just gets annoyed and maybe wants to fight/physically over an issue. needless to say, a lot of my discussions with them are pointless (my mother the least so). all 3 are 2nd born children. they all get jealous and can loose control via anger easily. i don’t get jealous, nor do i allow it to take-hold or develop in me. i don’t see any point in getting angry unless there’s an emergency maybe. i’m just not into forcing people to do things. in general, they’re all reasonably smart, but none of them are able to handle well my thoughts or insights in person. when both my father and brother could no longer beat me anymore in chess, they both stopped playing me. oh well, home life…’twas lots of fun. are these traits just specific to me or do RhD negs have some problems w/ positives like i do w/ my entire natural born immediate family? – thoughts – comments – questions – anyone?

• Robin June 26, 2020 Reply

  Your not alone!!! That’s the word, too deep, your passionate, dramatic, intense, there falling asleep and I’m on the edge of a new epiphany!!! And no one gets it!!!until ten years down the road…ooooh, you were right, not crazy! Well little to late for that reality, I knew, you didnt, called me nuts, now apologizing ten years later!!!you were right let’s forget about it!!! Really???? I’m tired of delayed apologies???how bout you??

2. - Ken - June 27, 2020 Reply

   i don’t look for people to thank me…i don’t expect people to say you were right…many still won’t do this or admit they were wrong…i’ve learned, and now i don’t care to prove anything to others in general. i live my life…they can live theirs’. no problems mostly, unless i have to interact w/ pushy people telling me what to do, how to live, what to think and so on. i still seek the strength to control my actions and response/s to those i often have problems w/. i seek to choose my interactions/battles…i prefer to have lots of control over my own life. so, all things considered to this point roughly, i tend to keep to myself. some women can get my attention. most other people can’t w/out creating problems. happiness/satisfaction are personal emotions/feelings/knowings. they’re fleeting, they don’t last w/out effort to maintain them & keep them / have them around. what makes you happy, satisfied, content Robin?

• Robin June 29, 2020 Reply

  Ken, I’m content in nature, around animals, helping others. When someone does not get “me” and there answer is ok…that works. I’m content with team work, the freedom to have my own identity and not have to conform to popular norms. I have been told what to do, what to say, how to act…I’m content with having control over my choices. I’m a very hard worker, I’m passionate about treating people with dignity and respect. I’m content with friends roasting hotdogs on a stick over a bonfire. I’m content when humans are humane, that no one person is more or less than another. That we are equal and one person’s strength helps another’s weakness and vise versa. When people project superiority , harm me by breaking laws, cause divisions, or question truth…if they hurt me I’m not content…I’m not free…Freedom to choose, to write or paint or garden or just be is a battle for me…always something blocking my peace…I just want to be…Not a constant fight to just “be” I want peace and justice. To feel safe and loved… That’s what would make me content.

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